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March 23, 2005
On Terri Schiavo (one last time...)
I know that the Terri Schiavo case has more or less taken over the blogosphere. Part of the reason I haven't posted for the last few days (in addition to the fact that I've been sick) is that I didn't think I had anything to say about this situation that hasn't already been said.
I discovered My Vast Right Wing Conspiracy today through Hog On Ice. If half the things that Beth says in her Schiavo category are true, then there are some definite aspects to this case that need a closer look.
Steve H. at Hog on Ice wrote a lengthy post, "The View from the Front of the Bus", about the situation. While the whole post is interesting (especially the parts about the 'culture of death' in hospitals), the part that caught my eye was this:
That being said, there are many, many people out there to whom the marriage bond means much less than it does to me. These days, you marry someone you think you'll enjoy "hanging out with," and when it's not fun any more, you move on, because hey, you've got to look out for Number One. If Michael Schiavo sees marriage this way, he clearly has no business running his wife's life, and her parents should be in charge.
I'm curious how much of a husband you can consider a man who's got a long-term girlfriend and a couple of kids by said girlfriend. (I've seen that some people have suspicions that she was his girlfriend even before Terri was in this state, but I don't know one way or the other on that.) Unless they had an open marriage, I'm not sure why anyone would consider him her 'husband' any longer (Except, of course, that marriage as a term is meaningless if you try to define it using words like "love" or "commitment" in today's society; it's strictly a legal term to most people.)
I've been accused of being a Puritan, and I have a dear friend who calls me a "crazy Fundy", so maybe my take on this is a little bit off, but would it have been so hard for him to either stay true to his vows or divorce his brain dead wife? I know, I know: How could I ever dare to say that this man didn't have the right to move on, seeing as how his wife has been incapable of fulfilling his sexual or emotional needs? I'm not honestly looking too harshly on him and his new girlfriend; I'm just wondering why the husband who's replaced her in his life is considered a bigger expert on what she'd want.
I know that Terri's case is a contentious one, but I hope that everyone could agree on two things:
- The 'other side' of this debate is not a homogeneous collection of rabid Christian fundamentalists, nor is it a group of Nazis drooling over the chance to start killing those they deem imperfect.
- From all perspectives, this is a very sad situation.
Let's suppose, first, that Michael Schiavo's version of the story is true. His wife has been dead for fifteen years now. Her family, tragically, is clinging to something that used to belong to her and treating it as though it is her.
What if they're right, and Terri is alive, and at least partially aware. She shows signs of recognizing those around her. She tries (and fails) to communicate. Whether her mind is truly human anymore, or if the brain damage has reduced her to something less, the cage that her body has become would be torturous. Especially if, as some of the proponents of letting her live claim, she could be helped by physical therapy but has been denied it for fifteen years.
If you fail to see the tragedy in either of those two situations, well, you're lucky that we live in a society that, thus far, doesn't encourage the execution of the less-than-human; being emotionally crippled is just as dehumanizing as anything Terri Schiavo's gone through. (Though, I suspect the emotionally crippled would be the ones running the executions of the less fortunate, so you'd probably be okay.)
There are those on both sides of this debate who act as though it's a simple dilemma. Either you should always aim for life, no matter the quality of that life, or you should let her go, period, no further discussion or thought necessary. Unfortunately for those people, whichever side they're on, the world isn't black and white. That doesn't mean we just pick whatever we want to be the "right thing", but sometimes finding the lightest shade of gray in the picture takes some time and thought. If they're not capable of giving either, then they should just step aside and let others get the chance to speak.
Posted by Robin S. at March 23, 2005 02:44 PM
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